why does my husband always say i'm 'too sensitive' when i try to talk about my feelings?

you're not crazy, this is such a common pattern and it sucks because 'too sensitive' basically ends the conversation before it even starts. it's a deflection, honestly. way easier to say that than to sit with 'oops i hurt her.' and the fact that you've started going quiet instead of speaking up makes total sense, but yeah that's the slippery slope where resentment just builds silently. what sometimes helps is naming the pattern itself instead of the specific incident, like 'when i bring something up and you call me sensitive, i shut down and stop telling you things, and that's not good for us.' takes it out of 'you hurt my feelings this one time' territory. some guys really do come around once they get it's costing them closeness, not just costing you a vent. others dig in more. if you say it clearly a couple times and nothing shifts, a counselor can help you both actually hear each other.

ok first, you're not crazy, and going quiet to keep the peace makes total sense but it's also kinda the trap he's accidentally set for you. 'too sensitive' is doing a lot of work in that sentence, it lets him skip the actual conversation entirely. here's the thing though, this can change, but not mid-argument when he's already halfway to the tv. try bringing it up later, calm moment, something like 'hey when i tell you something hurt and you call me sensitive, i shut down instead of us actually working through it. i need you to hear me even if you didnt mean it that way.' name the pattern, not just the one joke. some guys genuinely don't realize it's a pattern until you point at the pattern itself. if you name it clearly and he still brushes past it every time, that's real information too. don't give up on saying stuff yet, you deserve to be heard, not managed.